The MarySue Mercenaries
by Zairinn
Summary: Nico never knew the meaning of the term 'Mary-sue'. But all that changes when he stumbles across a group that has formed to destroy these horrid creatures. Now,they use him as bait since he does attract Mary-sues.How will Nico face these hard challenges?
1. The Tumble

**Okay this is like a mild crack fic. As I said before I may be on hiatus for awhile because my computer has technical difficulties, my certificate expired *grumble* *grumble*, so now it's either I give my USB to my friend, Cheshire Chameleon, or use either my mom's, brother's or try the iPad which is very hard mind you. If you think this story may be weird in the start, just read further and you'll understand but the explanation is in the next chapter, which I already thought of. Anyway let's get onto the story.**

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><p>A young boy with dark hair and even darker eyes strolled around Camp Half-Blood. He wore this look on his face saying 'I'm very bored so I'm strolling around'. Apparently, he was unaware of the creature stalking him, behind the bushes to his left. The boy glanced at the bushes and was pondering on the thing that kept on rustling behind it. He then shrugged, losing interest, and strolled further. Then suddenly the bushes rustled, again, and out came a girl with chocolate brown hair with natural blonde streaks and constant-color-changing eyes. Blue then red then purple then green then black and so on.<p>

"Nico-poo! Where have you been? I've been looking all over for you!" She squealed and rammed into him and, therefore, made him loose his footing and fall to the grassy ground.

Her constant-color-changing eyes stared addoringly at his dull brown eyes. On the other hand, Nico was freaking out. A lot.

"Wh-who are you?" He shoved her off himself and scrambled further up the hill.

"Don't you remember me Nico? We used to happily run down these very hills." Seeing the confusion in Nico's eyes she started to bawl. "You...seriously...don't...re...re...rem...rem...reme...remem...ber...?" She said in between sobs.

"Uh..." Nico looked even more confused than he ever had in his life, okay, okay maybe I'm exaggerating but still. "No...?"

At this she suddenly perked up. " I heard the rise of you voice when you said 'no'. So do you still remember me?" She asked him hopefully.

Nico frowned and said, "No." Even steadier and surer than before.

At this small but very strong word she stood up, glared and ran away, tears flowing from her eyes. she suddenly stopped and shouted, "Very good Nico!"

To Nico's confusion she took of her hair—no, a wig— and she took of her contacts and grabbed a notebook from her sling bag. She stuffed the wig and contacts, of course in a case, into the bag.

She flipped to a page. "Have any Half-Bloods ever stared at you with these big, round, adoring eyes? She seemed like a normal girl. brown hair, brown eyes nothing much.

"No." Nico answered.

"Have any Half-abloods ran straight to your side or is or are the first to volunteer for you or any of these circumstances?" She looked at him expectantly.

"N-Hold on!" Nico was annoyed with this girl, the way she suddenly stopped her charade and quickly went into interrogation mode. "Explain everything to me first. From the start."

She sighed. "Well, I do owe you an explanation." She sat down on the grass and said, "I think you better sit down since this may be a long explanation."

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><p><strong>Okay, I know some of you are going to complain that I should do my first story first but this just suddenly popped into my head. Oh and I'm sorry if it's short. I'll make the other chapters longer.<strong>

**Sorry for grammar or spelling mistakes. I don't want to get a beta since you have to e-mail it to them and Gods know how long they may take to send it back to you. So I prefer either letting my friend do it or I simply upload it, and check it myself in case.**

**To make things clear about the P.O.V. First let's say I'm telling the story so I can place side comments. Let's also say that Nico told me everything and I'm just relaying it to you through talking, not typing. Kapeesh? **

**I heartily accept flames, harsh constructive criticism or any of the things related to that.**

**Hope you enjoyed this.**


	2. The Beginning

**Here it is, the next chapter. The chapters will be short since I have another story which is my top priority. I'll shorten my babble so you can read.**

**Disclaimer: Zee zwo znot zown zee Zwercy Zackson andz ze Zolympains.**

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><p>"Nico, the group I work for k- Err, I mean terminate these creatures known as Mary-Sues." She stopped to let everything sink into Nico's head, or maybe so he'll concentrate more because his ADHD has kicked in. "They have sent me to recruit you because of your, don't get offended by this, ability to attract these vile creatures." She finished.<p>

"Well, that wasn't very long." Nico said to cut the silence.

Well, I know that but I just estimated it wrong." She replied. "Nico, go to your cabin and ready your stuff. We're going to MSM headquarters."

Nico didn't budge. "I think we have to introduce ourselves properly."

The girl was getting impatient. "Less talky more packy." She then shooed him away.

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><p>"Oh, Daddy!" A girl clad in pink ran to her father. "Can I go out with Alfonso today?"<p>

"Yes, Mary." Sir Mantal muttered under his Blackberry torch.

"Yay!" Mary Eliza Beth Mantal squealed happily.

"Just make sure you don't spend anything above $9,000,000,000 sweetie." Sir Mantal reminded.

But Mary was just to preoccupied texting her boyfriend, Alfonso, in her Stuart Hughes iPhone 4 Diamond Rose Edition that cost 8 million dollars but to Mary's standards it was not that expensive.

Mary ran up to her room and looked at herself in the mirror once more before she leaves. Her golden blonde hair was permed to perfection and her royal blue eyes were popping out of her tanned skin. She was now ready to meet her beloved.

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><p>"Okay, I kept my part of the bet, how about yours?" Nico asked.<p>

"Okay, my name is Mary Sue Cupboardson." She declared.

"Your _real_ name." Nico said.

"Okay, okay. My name is Mara Theevashkovanalertis." She said, smiling.

Nico was getting annoyed. "Your REAL name." Nico nearly shouted.

"The organization strictly says I should never reveal our real names so I'll just give you the name I usually use in missions." She explained. "Call me Storm."

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><p>Maria Ivashkova twirled in her white off shoulder dress.<p>

"Maya, don't you think this is the best dress I bought?" Maria gushed. Even if Maria is Russian she could speak English fluently without that accent.

Maya rolled her eyes under her sketch pad. "Yes, yes it looks great on you." She mumbled.

Maria was wearing a white off shoulder dress with black silk wrapped around her waist and intricate golden embroidery on the top and on the bottom were white ruffles. Her mid thigh brown hair was tied in a fish tail and her red eye shadows complimented her sea green eyes.

"Buh-bye, Maya." She flipped her hair and does the tsunami walk.

"Yes, bye sister." Maya slurred.

Once Maya was sure Maria was far enough, she took out her phone and dialed "her" number.

"Commence Operation Mars." She closed her phone and smirked. "It. Starts. Now."

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><p><strong>Yes, I finally update. I have introduced some new characters. And no, I will not place a chapter showing all the characters. Waste of time and chapters. That's why when I place AUs I remove them right away so It won't disrupt the flow.<br>**

** I have exams and we're required to study 3 languages (Not crammed into 1 test, separate.) so of course I had to study longer for those subjects. But I like exams because we get out of school at 10 a.m! Ahh, I have so much free time but I use it up either doing something else or studying those 3 languages, which I will never tell you because if I do, you may know where I live. See you next chapter!**


	3. The Meetings

**I'm to lazy to work on my other one. And I wont show the mercenaries' real names so the names you see are their code names. But I'll have to reveal a couple of their real names like Mara. Their names will sometimes change to their real names if they have a very close connection to the sue.  
><strong>

**Disclaimer: This will be for ALL, I don't own PJO.**

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><p>Saturn watched her new mission attentively. She clicked the button on her ear piece.<p>

"Venus, Venus can you hear me?" She whispered.

"Well, duh." Came the response. It's amazing that Venus seems so much like a Mary-sue but, yet, not one.

"Watch Subject 5 and 6's movements. They are our main targets for today." Saturn instructed.

"Kay, kay." Venus replied.

"Watch them and be careful." Saturn instructed.

Venus smirked. "when was I never careful." She gracefully jumped down from her post, a 6 story dilapidated building. "Let the games begin."

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><p>"Get in." Storm said.<p>

Nico stared at the empty space Storm gestured too. "There's nothing there."

"Oh, oops." She took out a remote with a lot of multicolored buttons and pressed one. In front of him materialized a black ship. In the middle of 2 gigantic wings was a oval shaped pod connected to the wings with steel bars.

"H-h-h-h-h—" Nico was just to amazed to talk properly.

"How did we do it?" Nico nodded. "Well, Luckily, the Gods are on our side and they supply us with these gadgets. They're helping us they are ashamed to have their mutated offsprings."

"Okay." Nico's day was getting weirder. But he didn't know how weird it will get.

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><p>"Victory is ours!" Victoria was pretty sure of this even though they were down by 3 points and they only had 30 seconds left. Victoria waved her hands and something shimmery came out of it, of course only she can see it.<p>

"He shoots, he scores! Victory to the Goblins!" The crowd erupted in cheers. Victoria jumped up and ran to her twin brother, Wally North.

"We won, we won!" Victoria jumped up to hug her brother who still couldn't believe they won.

"Ye-yeah, we did." He mumbled.

"Ehmagawd! Let's celebrate!" Victoria took out her cash stuffed wallet. "Let's go to Luigi's Pizzaria." At this sentence the whole place became so silent you could hear a needle fall. Luigi's Pizzaria has got to be the most expensive Pizza Parlor ever, and it is so worth it. Only well off people could go there and Victoria was a very well off person.

"Sure Victoria go ahead, I'll just get changed first." After seeing Victoria nod he rushed to the lockers.

He pressed the button on his earpiece. "Jupiter here, subject 8 will be leaving the area perimeter in 5 minutes."

"Thanks Jupiter, we will go to our stations." Came the static filled voice. "Well do it from here."

"My pleasure." He replied. "I just hope everything goes to plan, not like before."

"We'll make sure of that."

"Thanks."

"Mercury, off and out."

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><p>"...Yes...Okay...Where?...Okay...Bye." Storm turned off her ear piece. "Looks like we need to pick up some people."<p>

"Yes, yes." Nico grumbled.

"Well, off to Brooklyn." She swerved the steering wheel.

"B-Brooklyn?" This was the first time Nico has ever visited Brooklyn. Chiron once said that no demigod should go to Brooklyn, because we'd be interfering with the 'other Gods'.

"Yes Brooklyn, why?" Storm was very oblivious to Nico's panic.

"A-aren't you a demigod?"

Yes, why?"

"Then shouldn't you know Chiron's warning?"

"His warning?"

Nico facepalmed. "Never mind. By the way, who's your Godly parent?"

"Hebe, Goddess of youth and cup bearer of the Gods also the wife of Heracles, which is a lie." She explained. "Ah, well we're here. Nico you come down with me."

"Sure." He unbuckled his seat belt and walked out of the door.

Outside was a dilapidated city. Old buildings, houses and factories surrounded the streets. Some even looked ready to collapse any minute.

"Saturn!" Storm shouted.

"Yes?" A voice said at the back of Nico. Nico quickly looked back but, to his surprise, didn't see anyone.

"I'm here already." He turned back and saw a girl slightly older than him with black hair and hazel eyes.

"Nico, meet Saturn. Saturn meet Nico." She said this next part very softly so Nico won't hear. "And project Magnus."

"Well, hello Nico. Nice to meet you." She stuck out her hand. Nico shook it.

"How was your mission?" Storm inquired.

"_Is_, Venus is still watching them."

"Okay, Lord Hermes needs us to go back to Olympus. Well, the ones who are done." She checked the holographic picture in front of her.

"So who else do we need to pick up?"

"You, Jupiter, Hurricane, Earth, Quake, Tsunami and Neptune."

"Well, let's get going." Saturn then ran to the invisible ship.

"How long will this pick up take?" Nico asked

"Probably the whole day considering they're scattered all over the world."

"What?"

Storm looked at him. "These Mary-sues aren't only in America, they are all over the world."

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><p><strong>Okay, when I introduce all the characters I'll put a list So you won't get confused, but I'll put them on the author notes. See you next chapter and wish me luck for my exams!<strong>


	4. Landing

**NEW CHAPTER! Why hello there, it has been a while. I will continue in the bottom.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Percy Jackson and the Olympians.**

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><p>Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way sashayed out of her 9 story mansion and ran towards the black, pink and white Lamborghini that was covered with silver and gold skulls. She opened the door and drove towards Raven Yard Academy.<p>

When Ebony got out of her car all of the boys stared at her. Why? It was because of her waist length hair with purple streaks and tipped with red, her piercing icy blue eyes like limpid tears, her extremely beautiful body, clear complexion and her custom made uniform. But her eyes weren't on anyone else other than one boy.

"Hey, babe." The boy with spiky black hair and startling blue eyes slurred.

"Well hello to you too." I smiled.

Kiel, Ebony's boyfriend, wrapped his arms around her waist and said, "Let's go in."

Ebony giggled. "Sure."

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><p>"Neptune, Neptune are you there?" Storm asked into the radio.<p>

"Of course I am." Came the static voice of a boy. "I'm suppose to be taking a test right now."

"How's your mission going?" Storm inquired.

"It's going great." He grumbled. "Well, for the mission but not for me."

"Yeah, it's sad that you had to be her boyfriend to eliminate her." Saturn said.

"Shut up." Neptune muttered. "Well, I have to go now. I'll contact you when I'm done."

"Sure." Storm pressed the big red button. "I feel so bad for him. Having to handle such a mission all by himself." She said.

"Well, to make subject 40 feel more wanted, Solar sent Nova to help Neptune by fighting over Subject 40." Saturn said.

"Hold on, I've never heard you guys say any real names other than 'subject' or names of Heavenly Bodies. Why don't you say their real names?"

"Nico, I told you before, we,", She gestured to Saturn and herself, "are not allowed to say our real names." Storm said in exasperation.

"We also don't know why we call them subjects. We just do." Saturn added.

"You guys come from an odd organization." Nico said.

"We know."Saturn said.

"Well, it looks like we have arrived." Storm said.

"Who are picking up?" Saturn asked.

"Tsunami."

"Where is she?" Nico asked. "Or he."

"All the way in Japan." Storm replied.

"Isn't that far?" Nico asked.

"Duh. That's why we have the superspeedexelarator-inator." Saturn said.

"Is that the real name?" Nico asked, bewildered.

"Oh yes, Nico. Then Unicorns will start running around you saying: Nnnnnico, let's go to Candy Mmmmountain." She then pretended to impersonate a unicorn, horn and all.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." Nico grumbled.

"Nico, go back to your seat. We're about to go to acceleration." Storm started to push buttons and pull levers. Nico quickly ran to his seat and buckled the seat belt.

Storm then pushed a big blue button. _Why are they always big, obvious buttons?_ Nico thought. Nico suddenly felt his face practically being torn in half. He started to grin. He started to feel like a crazy man because he was grinning like crazy for no apparent reason.

The pressure on Nico's face suddenly stopped. But he still felt crazy since he was still grinning like a lunatic. "We're here." Storm said.

Nico unbuckled his seat belt and slapped his cheeks to relax his muscles.

"Well,." Saturn placed her hands on her hips. "Hello Tokyo."

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><p><strong>Hehehehe...Ebony, or as I like to call it Enoby, has made a guest appearing from the worst fanfic ever. The name is My Immortal repost by Dreamreaver. It's TERRIBLE. Grrr, I HATE you FR*NC*N*E! That is a sudden outburst about my FORMER friend who Just happened to ask me something when I was in a hurry and I nodded and now she thinks I smoke. Of course I don't, Why would I? It stinks, I mean the smell. She shouted it to practically the whole class but told the person she shouted it to that she was joking. I HATE YOU! Well, see you next chapter!<br>**


	5. Sighting

**Why hello there again. Blah blah blah, yaddy yaddy yadda... And yes. those mispellings of Ebony's name are on purpose because it cracks me up.**

**This chapter was beta-ed by my best friend, Cheshire Chameleon. And she'll probably be betaing the next chapters..  
><strong>

**Disclaimer: I don't own PJO or those heavenly bodies.**

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><p>"NO!" exclaimed Kiel, "She's mine!"<p>

"She doesn't even like you! She likes _me_." Kenneth shouted back.

"Boys, boys, don't fight over me. I can be with both of you." Enoby soothed.

Since Ebony's sweet and gentle voice could calm the worst of hurricanes, the worst tsunami, it calmed both Kiel and Kenneth.

Enoby smiled. "Good, now get along and skip while holding hands around a meadow like flower maidens." Her voice was so persuasive they actually did it, holding hands and all. Who knows how a meadow got there. Oh yes! It's because of Eobny's freaking magical voice.

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><p>"Tsunami, are you done?" Saturn asked into her little wrist watch.<p>

"Yes, now pick me up before he finds me." Replied a panicked voice of a girl.

"Well, too bad for you." Saturn closed the cap before Tsunami could reply again.

"Off to Seiki Academy!" Saturn commanded.

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><p>Violet's rainbow eyes pierced Alfred's dark brown eyes. They leaned in closer and closer until some stupid dimwit interruted them.<p>

"What the effing hell!" Violet was so mad that she blew his head off with a shiny rainbow.

"Now, where were we?" She sweetly asked Alfred.

Alfred, who flinched, said, "Leaning closer."

They finally kissed. To Violet it was the best thing in the whole universe, even more than those dimwitted gods. To Alfred? Well, to put it simply, it was like hell.

When Alfred arrived home he ran towards his room but first went to the bathroom to wash the terrible taste of Violet Europe's Strawberry-flavored lip gloss.

After washing his tongue(with a bar of soap at that), he entered his room and grabbed his laptop.

"Storm" He groaned in agony.

"Hm?" Only then had she realized that he was there. "What?"

"Get me outta here."

"Later. We still need to get Tsunami who is in dire need of our help. Sorry." Storm said with no feeling.

"B-b-bu-bu-bu-but—"

"I'm really sorry, next few hours?"

"B-b-b-b-b-bu-bu—" Storm clicked the end button.

"Who was that?" Saturn asked.

"Earth, he hates her. Wants to get out, fast." Storm said quickly while dodging a pack of giggling japanese school girls staring at a boy.

"Well, sadly he's one of the last ones to pick up." Saturn said sympathetically.

"Ah, well, we're here." Storm said.

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><p><strong>Heehee, this cliffy thing is highly amusing. Well, to me, not to you guys. 2 chapters and now they're in Japan...I love Japan! Can I start to randomly gush?...SURE! I was only 8 when I last went there. Disneyland, Disney Sea...Tasty food...Sanrio Land (but I wasn't able to go...)...ANIME! Shoot, I wish when I was 8 I had an obsession in anime so I could enjoy it more.I'm done! Well, I do love anime...Gah, such a geeky thing. See you next chapter!<strong>


	6. IMPORTANT!

_**IMPORTANT:**_

Sorry guys, I don't think this will ever continue. I'm over my PJO and TKC phase, but I still like them. I am currently stuck on DA by the way, RP groups and all. So there just might be this really, REALLY slight chance I might continue but there might be a bigger chance of me updating MsM since it's a crack fic and all. Again, so Sorry!


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